Many of us may have shared the experience of going into a retail boutique and having the feeling that the sales people don't think we are worth their effort. These places usually have name-brand items at full retail. In a recent shopping experience I expected to find a couple of college-age kids working in the store. What I got was a couple of older women. They reminded of when I was in college, working at a large retailer, and being mentored by "sometimes crabby" ladies this age.
I don't know if I wasn't wearing the right clothes or maybe my mascara scared them off but it took me a few minutes to warm up to these ladies.
I walked in and was greeted. When asked if I needed help, I said I was "just looking". I started to look around. I found some pants I was interested in and pulled a folded pair off the shelf. Another sales lady comes over to me and was very assertive about helping me with my size. My initial impression was that she didn't want me to take the pants off the shelf as there was no way I could fold them correctly. She would immediately begin straightening everything I touched. It was obvious she wanted to touch them. Maybe my paws were grimy.
Fortunately, that style of pants wasn't what I was looking for so she suggested some others. She didn't seem very warm and friendly. She finally left me alone for awhile and I picked out some things and she took them back to a dressing room, warming up a bit. Maybe she realized I really did want to buy something.
Once I told her I was a yoga instructor, she told me about a special program they have for instructors. That was good. It saved me 30% off full price items.
In the meantime, another lady walks into the store. She was wearing a business suit and lots of make-up. Both ladies were very chatty with her. She left after about 30 seconds.
It's easy to place blame on them but maybe I can look at how I present myself. Each of us has an opportunity to make each encounter pleasant or not-so pleasant so shouldn't we choose the former taking control of the situation as much as possible?
I probably wasn't approachable. When I'm shopping, I prefer to be left alone until I have a question. I realize that I wasn't getting what I wanted and I was reacting to it.
I seemed hard to please. None of the pants she was trying to show me were right. Maybe that was frustrating to her and she was reacting to that.
Maybe she was just having a bad day or a bad moment. I don't have to react to other people's bad moments.
Yes, I was kind of "mad" that she seemed rude but rather than letting myself be managed by this emotion, I distracted myself and stayed focus on what I wanted to accomplish. In this case, find comfortable clothes that I liked and that fit me in this store (I had a gift card). I tried to make myself more approachable, cracked a few jokes, smiled more, and engaged the sales person in conversations about the clothes. It seemed to work. I got what I wanted. She got sales.
Yes, the encounter could have been more pleasant but I'm glad that I made myself aware of my reactions and steered myself in a different direction. There is no blame to assign, just perceptions and reactions to each moment.
Namaste.
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